Bill Clinton Just Keeps Getting More Awesome

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Gotta love this down home folksy political wisdom for Billary…

“Suppose you’re a voter, and you’ve got candidate X and candidate Y. Candidate X agrees with you on everything, but you don’t think that candidate can deliver on anything at all. Candidate Y you agree with on about half the issues, but he can deliver. Which candidate are you going to vote for?”

Umm….what are you trying to say Bill?

“This has nothing to do with what’s going on now.”

Ahhhhh, glad you pointed that out. See, because I thought you were talking about Obama and McCain. But if you weren’t, then cool. I see now, you were just playing a fun little logic game that just so happened to parallel what voters may be thinking about the current Democratic and Republican candidates. Cool. Got ya.

Anyway, I’ve got a scenario for you Bill. Try this one on for size…

Let’s say you’ve got this former President, let’s call him Former President B. And he’s acting as a surrogate for his wife, let’s call her Candidate H, during her campaign to win the White House. The only problem is her rival, Candidate O, has out-messaged and out-organized her at every turn. What to do? Well, if you’re Former President B, you go to work trying to frame Candidate O as somebody who won’t be able to get anything done. You even go so far as to suggest that Candidate O’s candidacy is only succeeding in certain locales because of his race. Other contests throughout the election prove this to be a false assertion, but if you’re President B and you desperately want to get back into the White House on Candidate H’s coattails so you can be sort of a shadow President, you’d pretty much have your campaign do or say anything, right? Like talking about Candidate O’s drug use as a teen, or leaking pictures of Candidate O in weird, foreign outfits or releasing videos of Candidate O’s pastor saying crazy stuff.

Silly thing, though, all of these gambits fall short and Candidate H fails in her bid to win the nomination for her party. What to do? Well, if you’re Former President B, do you think something as silly as not winning will stop you? Pffft. Puh-leez. No, you’ll try to systematically make it hard for Candidate O to get a foothold with Candidate H’s voters because you know that if Candidate O fails to win the Presidency, well, Candidate H can start running for President next time around.

Sound familiar? No? Well it shouldn’t, because it was just a scenario. Doesn’t have anything to do with what has gone on in 2008. I’m just putting it out there because it would be REALLY sad and pathetic if something like that were to happen. I mean, who would respect Former President B after doing that stuff? I know I wouldn’t.

Okay, enough of that fun…

By the way, Candidate X? Really? Do you think you could have picked ANY other letter than one associated with a famous militant black leader?

Thanks for being awesome Bill.